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Published on November 13th, 2011 | by Yellow Magpie


Derren Brown Quotes: Mindful And Wickedly Funny


Derren Brown quotes

Here is a selection of the very best Derren Brown quotes:

‘I had to get up at five in the morning to push that man around the market and the only reason why I do this job, my only motivation, is that I don’t have to get up early – and I didn’t even get a free apple. Bastards.’

‘Now I know what you are thinking; “how did he know what was drawn in the envelope?” Clearly, I must have detected in his voice the accent of my home town, Bristol, so he’s only going to be thinking of a tractor or marrying your own sister. A tractor’s easier to draw so Bob’s your uncle… and your Dad. And you’d be right.’

‘Few things make me more livid than insulting bad theatre of any sort. Conversely, perfectly realised and exquisitely elegant performance can move me deeply and reduce me to sobbing like a big girl.’

‘Fingers: We all have them and shouldn’t be ashamed of them.’

‘Moderate religious people may of course express distaste for such violence, pretending that the clear calls for grotesque and violent behaviour in their sacred book aren’t there and cherry-picking the ‘nice bits’, but they are still guilty of not opening up the subject of belief to rational discourse, and in doing so are part of the machinery that leads to all the ugliness caused by fundamentalism.’

‘By the end of tonight, all but one of these students will be dead. That’s not true. I’d give them about a week.’

‘If a piece of ‘alternative medicine’ can be shown to work reliably, it ceases to become alternative. It just becomes medicine.’

‘Seems the seance has become the most complained-about show. It received 700 complaints. I might add that the prospect of me blowing my head off on live TV last year attracted only twenty. Fair enough, I suppose.

‘Laugh at me at school would they? Soon they will all pay. The fools! I’ll teach them I’ll teach them to mock me. No I’ll teach them not to mock me. Yes.’

‘Have your cake and eat it… there’s no other reason to have a cake’

For more information and Derren Brown quotes from the man himself you may wish to check out his site.

You may also wish to check out Yellow Magpie’s Penn Jillette Quotes: The Speaker’s Thoughts, Harry Houdini Quotes: The Great Magician Speaks and David Copperfield Quotes: The Magician On Art And Magic

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2 Responses to Derren Brown Quotes: Mindful And Wickedly Funny

  1. Pingback: Penn Jillette Quotes: The Speaker's Thoughts

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