Published on December 10th, 2011 | by Yellow Magpie1
Ann’s Story: Chapter Twenty Seven ‘Little Faith’
The pregnancy went reasonably well though Ann’s blood pressure did go up and she was constantly tired.
Joe, in his favour, was attentive but also wary and awkward around her not really knowing what to do or say.
It was a different story in work with John, who was much more comfortable and made a fuss of her, while Katie was extremely supportive telling her to take as much time off as she needed and her job would be safe.
Meanwhile Thelma was beyond excited. She had bought baby clothes and helped Ann to pick out a pram and cot and to choose the colours for the nursery.
Ann felt lucky to have such support, she had long given up on any thoughts of romance with Joe and their relationship was now just a friendship. This often made her sad as in the early days she had dreamt of marriage but it was never going to happen and she had resigned her self to that fact now.
When the day for the delivery of her child arrived Ann was fearful and hoped that everything would be alright with the baby and herself. She knew her age was against her and the birth would take a lot out of her.
In the end her baby daughter was born by Caesarean section. When Ann looked down into the face of her very own baby girl tears welled up and she sobbed with happiness and relief. She was beautiful and entirely perfect.
Thelma, who had come into the delivery room with her, was jumping up and down between rubbing Ann’s forehead and looking at the child she too erupted into a mixture of laughter and tears.
‘Oh Ann she is adorable, look at her little face, the pet. Oh I am so excited I can’t wait to push her down the street in the pram.’ She said before looking at Ann for approval.
‘Of course you will push her down the street you idiot, you better, I will be depending on you.’
Ann called her daughter Faith it was a name she had decided on early in her pregnancy as she knew she would need a whole lot of faith to get her through.
When Joe saw his daughter he looked smitten but again was slightly uncomfortable about holding her and looked relieved when Ann took her back. But she knew that he would do his best to support her and little Faith.
John on the other hand was like an old pro he had no bother taking her up and gently rocking her from side to side.
Ann was nervous about taking her home and wondered how she would cope alone with the baby. Thelma said she would come over some nights and do the night feeds. Though Ann wanted to feed the baby herself. So she compromised and breast fed her during the day and Thelma bottle fed her on the nights she stayed over.
John came to visit often and Ann began to realise that he had feelings for her and she was growing very fond of him too. However, she was in no mood for another relationship and was content enough with the status quo.
True to her word, Thelma was there like a mother hen and would take every opportunity to head off down the road with Faith in the pram always coming back with a little dress or little booties or something. She was wonderful.
When Ann asked her to be godmother she began to cry and said she would be honoured. Ann decided to christen her daughter Faith Thelma to honour her good friend. There were more tears when Thelma heard this.
Faith was a placid enough little child and after a few months settled down to sleep through the night much to Ann’s relief. The neighbours who were initially surprised soon got used to Ann wheeling out her baby and often stood admiring her.
Meanwhile her maternity leave flew and she found herself thinking about how she would manage when she returned to work.
She rang Katie and following some research by John discovered that there was a crèche almost next door to Katie’s studios. So without further ado, Ann booked Faith in there. Though she did worry about getting her up so early and travelling with her on a train every day but she couldn’t bear to leave her at home and not see her all day long. At least if she was next door she could pop in and out at lunch time.
And so began the daily commute with Faith wrapped up warmly for the hour-long train journey. After a while the regular commuters began to get used to the tiny bundle in the carry cot and would ask about her.
Ann was so proud of her little daughter and couldn’t believe she was a mother. She wanted so much for Faith and prayed that she would grow up strong, confident and kind.
Joe often met her in the city and sometimes at lunchtime they would bring Faith to the nearby park. As she began to get bigger Ann noticed that Joe seemed to feel less and less self-conscious with her and would carry her in his arms with pride.
Ann couldn’t help wishing they were married and that Faith would have a proper mother and father but Joe never broached the subject and she knew he was seeing other women.
Back in the office Katie was as busy as ever while John was growing more and more attentive to Ann finally asking her out to dinner one evening.
Ann felt flustered by his invitation, her life was so taken up with Faith that dating was far from her mind. ‘Can I think about it John? I really appreciate you asking me and I am very fond of you. You have been such a help and support to me, it’s just at the moment I am all over the place.’
She could see he was disappointed but did his best to hide it saying of course it was alright he understood but he kept his distance with her for some time afterwards and Ann felt so guilty and missed him. She didn’t want to lose his friendship as she had grown to really enjoy his company.
In fact the more she thought about John the more attractive he was becoming. But she still said nothing more about dinner as she knew in her heart she wasn’t ready to launch out again. She was still quite raw from her relationship with Joe and her life was now so different that her head was not in the right place.
She hoped that John would have patience with her and wouldn’t lose interest but who could blame him if he did. In any case, after a period of staying away from her he was now back as friendly as ever much to Ann’s relief.