Published on July 9th, 2011 | by Yellow Magpie0
Ann’s Story: Chapter Eight ‘The Wish List’
‘Would you like to start making your wish list now?’
‘Okay, Ann answered enthusiastically. But no sooner had she said the words when the kitchen door flung open and there stood Thelma’s friend, the one Ann had seen through the window. Thelma jumped up and gave him a warm hug, he hugged her back, kissing her on the cheek.
Thelma turned around and introduced Ann to him, ‘Joe this is Ann, my friend from across the road, Ann, this is Joe.’
Ann felt flustered, Joe was so attractive and she felt awkward as she held out her hand, Joe took it in his, it was warm and firm. ‘Nice to meet you Joe,’ she said.
‘Well, I’ll head off and let you two have a chat, I will call over later maybe,’ Ann said abruptly heading towards the door’
‘I’m not interrupting anything, am I?’ Joe said looking confused.‘
No no, your’e grand, we were just having a chinwag’, Ann answered before Thelma could say anything.
‘You don’t have to go, Ann, stay and have lunch with us’, Thelma said catching Ann by the arm.
‘O God no thanks, I better be off’. Ann grabbed her dress and scooted down the hallway.
‘Nice to meet you, Joe’, she said over her shoulder, ‘I will see you later Thelma’ Ann announced, as she opened the front door and rushed out.
‘O God he is even more attractive than I thought,’ Ann said to herself. ‘What I wouldn’t do to have someone like him in my life.’Like a bolt out of the blue, Ann suddenly realized she never did anything to attract men, she just assumed they wouldn’t be interested in her, so she didn’t bother to try to make herself attractive.
What if I did try, to meet someone? ‘What If I tried to make myself look as attractive as I could, dress the best way I know how. I could, try to learn about new things, make myself interesting, what would happen then?’ she pondered.
Back at her own kitchen table Ann sat down with a pen and paper and began to write out her wish list.
‘I wish I was attractive to men. ‘
‘I wish I had beautiful clothes.’
‘ I wish I didn’t have to wear glasses.’
‘I wish I had a new job.’
‘I wish I was in love with a fabulous man who loved me in return.’
‘I wish I had more energy.’
‘I wish I had a beautiful home.’
‘I wish I had great friends.’
‘I wish I was well-educated and articulate.
‘I wish I was an accomplished and confident woman.’
‘I wish I could travel the world and see all the fabulous places there are to see.’
‘ I wish I could get to wear my new dress and go to a posh dinner and dance and leave everyone with their mouth opened as they see me looking gorgeous.’
‘Finally I wish I could make a real difference in the world in some way.’
The more Ann wrote the more wishes she came up with, finally she was finished and she looked at the list.
‘Really there is nothing too big on that list, thought Ann. ‘Hmmm Thelma had said take a tiny step each day and watch how your dreams come true.’
Ann, looked at the first thing on the list, ‘I wish I was attractive to men, what do men find attractive? she wondered.
She wrote on another page, ‘A good figure, a good sense of humour, interesting, friendly, relaxed, warm, sexy.’ But Ann didn’t feel any of those things, she felt like a dowdy frump, with mousy hair, dry skin and wrinkles, she hated her glasses and she longed to have long thick glossy hair, instead of her thin and coarse hair.
‘Where do I begin? Start with a little step, something that is really easy to do’, she told herself. ‘What could that be?’ Ann decided to go into town – her mission to get some anti wrinkle cream for her face and some rich shampoo and conditioner for her hair. ‘It was a tiny step but it was a step none the less.’ She told herself.
On her way back from the shops she decided she would take the whole week off and relax for a change. So as soon as she got home she rang work and told Julie to tell the boss she was taking a week’s holidays. ‘Stuff them’, she thought let them do without me for a while.
Following that she knew she was going to have to make some serious changes if she was going to improve her life.
She thought about going to college, but what she really wanted was to make her mark on the world in some way. To be somebody. She was tired of being invisible and feeling overlooked and taken for granted. She wanted the world to sit up and take note of her in some way. She needed a big expansive life. But she knew she had to start small.
Ann knew a lot of work was ahead of her and even though she had made her wish list when she looked at it once again there was nothing on it that really excited her, that would make her want to hop out of the bed in the morning and get going on the day.
It was something she was going to have to spend a lot of time thinking about over the next while. ‘Well you will have plenty of time to dedicate to that pursuit.’ She told herself dryly.